


slumbers

by catspajama_llamas



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Drabble, M/M, Mostly heartbreak, Reunion, Slight fluff, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-25
Updated: 2015-07-25
Packaged: 2018-04-11 04:01:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4420535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catspajama_llamas/pseuds/catspajama_llamas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream<br/>I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam<br/>And I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem<br/>But if I know you, I know what you'll do<br/>You'll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream"</p><p>He's awake.</p>
            </blockquote>





	slumbers

**Author's Note:**

> is it real,
> 
> or isn't it

///////////

_"I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream..."_

//////////

 

The first thing he knows he has to do is call her.

Haise dials the long-forgotten number on his phone after staring at the small slip of paper it was written on for what felt like hours. _"Just in case"_ , the note had read. His heart pounds, a thousand emotions taking its toll on him while he waits for her to answer. Never before had he been so anxious about hearing the dial tone. 

She finally answers before the last one. "So you remember now?"

Haise's heart stops. "Yeah. I do, Hori-san."

~

It hadn't taken quite as much as Chie had thought to get Kanae to agree. She had been right in talking to him. The boy simply couldn't take it anymore, putting his own self aside, and quite possibly the welfare of the others he loved, for the sake of his whole world. He was finally ready for it all to change, and Chie knew she had made the right choice. They all made quite the group, she thought. How lucky he really was.

Haise meets Kanae at the gates of the manor, Kanae barely acknowledging his presence. He leads him to where he needs to be, and that's the extent of it.

~

Kanae opens the door to Shuu's room, letting his master know that there's someone there to see him. Shuu only turns in acknowledgement to Kanae's words, his sense of smell too weak to notice a familiar scent that had long, long ago haunted him. Kanae steps out of the doorway, revealing Haise standing there. Haise's breath hitches.

He's not ready, nor will he ever be to see the sight before him.

There he lies, the man he once knew as being so prideful and always so composed, the man who once stood with such an air of confidence and strength, the man who once held such power in self and battle. There he lies, the man he once thought was the image of beauty, only a compliment to the even more astounding mind he held. There he lies, the man he once loved, and twice left behind. There he lies, the man he once knew as Shuu Tsukiyama, tangled in the sheets as only a shriveled shell of the person he used to be. 

 

//////////

_"I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam...."_

////////

 

He feels a tear being shed, his heart aching as he slowly walks over to the man. 

~

Shuu lifts himself up by inches to see the ghost that has appeared before him. He can't believe his eyes, nor does he trust them. He couldn't be real.. He knew it couldn't, after all the countless illusions and dreams he had had of this moment. But still, he remembers the photo Kanae had shown him (Weeks? Months? Days? Years? He couldn't remember when), and, cautiously, he raises a hand up to touch the face of his beloved, who stands at the side of his bed. He's holding his breath, waiting for the illusion to dissolve as soon as he touches it, much like it always does, but this time he meets solid flesh. Real, warm, living. He feels a wave of uncertainty hit him as he feels the apparition's hand cover his own where it sits, as he meets the gray eyes he had nearly forgotten the hue of, touches the wet trail that they are producing. He doesn't want to disappoint himself for the upteenth time, but he can't help it, lifting himself up and sitting upright, fully in front of the man, the ghost, before him, cradling its face and looking into each eye back and forth, back and forth. He doesn't want to disappoint himself, but he feels the man, the ghost, hold onto his wrists, hears a hiccuped laugh and blood rush to the soft flesh he touches under his hands. He doesn't want to disappoint himself, but he feels himself shedding silent tears, because although he looks differently (which concerns him, and puts him even more on edge towards his own fallible senses), he can't help but feel a hope beyond hope that this is his love, returned. 

"Ken," he utters, tears flowing. 

He never really did understand his own feelings.

He could swear that he hears that voice again, the voice he could never forget but yet seemed to have forgotten the tone of.

"I'm back," the mirage whispers, a fragile smile forming as he entwines their fingers together.

Tsukiyama snaps.

He wails, pulling the man on top of him and into his lap as he musters all the strength he still possesses in an embrace to last for the rest of his days. He attempts to touch every last inch of the man, pressing his hands against every detail, holding him tighter and tighter that Haise fears Tsukiyama might break. He by contrast is more delicate with him given his state, though he doesn't hold back either. He only holds on for dear life to the decrepit man as he feels how desperately, lovingly he touches him, all his memories mashing themselves together, staining the other's robe with his unrelenting tears.

Kanae bears witness to the scene. He never could hide his emotions as well as his Master Shuu could, and his face is broken. He leaves without another word, closing the door behind him, tears marking his face. They won't notice his absence. 

~

After getting over the initial shock, and after only holding onto each other for how long they couldn't say, they lay down together, the blankets enveloping them. They both stay in each other's arms still, Tsukiyama being afraid that the apparition will leave him again. Now that he's back, Tsukiyama can't bear the thought of him ever leaving. They content each other by burying their heads together, lost in the embrace and warmth. They don't speak a word again for the time being, both being too afraid to break the spell. 

When Haise thinks Tsukiyama has just about fallen asleep, he hears it. He sounds so broken, so weak that Haise thinks he can't ever fathom the depth of Tsukiyama's anguish. 

"Please.. Please.. Don't ever leave me again." 

As if he would ever be able to sleep again. 

Haise shifts, grasping the man's hand and pressing it against his own heart, while gently placing his other over Tsukiyama's. It's comforting to feel something so dependable beating underneath their hands, and tears fall out from the corners of Tsukiyama's hollowed eyes. He's learned to take nothing for granted anymore. He's still also not entirely sure the ghost is really there, but he moves his head to rest against the palm that lies on its chest, his ear replacing it to hear the steady beats. Haise stays very still, only bringing Tsukiyama closer as he curls into him, laying his hand now on the back of his head, running his fingers through the dark strands. He only feels very heavy, and very tired, his eyes taking in one last look at the frail figure before he shuts them. Despite his state, Shuu is still as beautiful as he ever was, and Haise only wishes it all could have gone differently. What a joke it all turned out to be..

"I'm still here. I'm awake."

 

//////////

_"And I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem  
But if I know you, I know what you'll do_

_You'll love me at once, the way you did_

_once_

_upon_

_a dream"_

**Author's Note:**

> Ugh
> 
> Anyways BEFORE CH 38 SPOILERS CAME OUT, I had this started as an 'imagine' sort of post, and then this happened. I really need to stop spamming this ship tag I am so sorry. BUT there might be hope, because hopefully I'll start writing decent crap once I start my fictional writing class next semester. Yay. Start blocking me now
> 
> Seriously I have so many songs ruined for me because of tsukikane. Ask me bc I have an entire list full of angsty songs, most of which include the smiths and the cure. I'm alwayS A SLUT FOR MORRISSEY AND ROBERT SMITH why is this relevant? It isn't. Well yeah it kinda is considering I added in "Once Upon a Dream" after thinking about how relevant it was to what I wrote.
> 
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
